


undefined

by fadedlight04



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-28
Updated: 2014-12-28
Packaged: 2018-03-04 01:54:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2905016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fadedlight04/pseuds/fadedlight04
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Story set after Finn's Death. Clarke isolates herself and Bellamy tries to be a good friend for her until it becomes more.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my very first FanFiction and it won't be a really good one. I just wrote what I had in my head but the Story will get another turn when I finish it. You'll see. :)
> 
> Also, my native language is not english, so I apologise for any mistakes or wrong grammar, time jumpes, etc!

-1-

Bellamy saw Clarke making her way back into the Camp while all the grounders were held back by Lexa.  
Raven broke down in his arms and he really wanted to help her,  
but just couldn’t concentrate even though she screamed and cried and punched into his chest.  
Bellamy’s eyes followed Clarke as she came back through the door of the Camp, her sight straight at the ground.  
She went straight into her tent and Abby followed her, but came back right after. All the other people whispered  
  
“how could she be that cruel?”, “how could she do this to him?”, “why didn’t she help him?”

  
‘Don’t they understand that this was the only possible way to save Finn? To save him from the terrible  
death and suffering the grounders would have put him through?’ Bellamy thought.  
He knew that this must be the hardest decision Clarke ever had to make. This way Finn could die in the arms of the one he loved.  
Bellamy had to choke at this thought, the one he loved. He knew Clarke loved Finn right back  
and he had no idea why it made him kind of sad.  
But he had to force himself to concentrate on Raven. She needed a friend right now.  
Bellamy carried Raven into her tent. She stopped being hysterically and cried quietly in his arms.

  
“It’s going to be okay”,

  
the words Bellamy said repeatedly in the past 20 minutes since Raven broke down. Finally in her tent,  
he lay her down on her bed and covered her with a blanket. Octavia put her head through the door.

  
“Do you need any help? Clarke doesn’t want to see anyone right now and I thought Raven needs a friend.”  
This is why he loved his sister; she always knew where to be at the right moment.  
“Yeah, I think Raven doesn’t want to have any men around her at the moment…” Bellamy said.  
“Alright I’ll stay tonight. It’s the least I can do“  
  
and with that Octavia sat down next to Raven and held her hand.

 

The following weeks were horrible for everyone. Clarke barley came out of her tent and Raven was full of hate against Clarke.  
Every time they met they mostly ended fighting and arguing.  
But then suddenly it changed.  
  
Bellamy doesn’t know how or why, but Raven stopped being mean to Clarke and Clarke stopped hiding in her tent.  
One day, everyone was eating lunch, Abby came to talk to Bellamy.

  
“Bellamy, I don’t know where Clarke is… I think she wanted to go out into the woods but that was a few hours ago and I start to worry.”

  
“I can go and look after her, that’s no problem!”

  
To be honest, Bellamy was happy to do that because he hasn’t talked to Clarke for weeks, he missed it.  
But he knew that she didn’t want to talk and if she did she would have done it. So Bellamy grabbed his gun,  
you never know what’s out there, and started looking for Clarke.

  
“Hey! Where do you think you’re going?”  
Octavia…  
“What do you want, O?”  
“I want to help”  
“I think it’s better to look for Clarke myself”  
“Ohh, yes… I’m sorry…”

  
She left. Thank god. He really wanted to be alone with Clarke.  
Bellamy searched the woods FOREVER and the night came and went away without any sign of Clarke.  
Where could she be? He didn’t want to stop looking until I found her, but he also didn’t take any rations with him.  
Another day went by and still no sign of Clarke. Bellamy almost lost hope when he arrived at a river.  
He decided to make a short break and sat down next to a rock, leaned his head against it and sighed.  
He missed Clarke. He didn’t want to admit it but maybe he had a thing for her.  
She was always there when Bellamy needed her or when was about to make the wrong decision.  
And now that she needed him in the last weeks he wasn’t there.  
‘I thought she didn’t want to talk to me. Maybe I was right but I could have tried it instead of just letting her alone in her grief.  
I feel terrible.’

  
“Dammit! No leave me alone! GO AWAY!”

  
That was her. Bellamy knew the sound of her voice. Clarke!  
It sounded as if she was fighting! He stood up as fast as he could and ran after her voice. Then he saw her.  
Clarke was on top of a rock and a giant tiger-ish creature standing at the bottom of the rock trying to climb it and striking at Clarke with its paws.  
Bellamy could see the fear in Clarkes face. When he reached the best position he aimed with his gun and shot the tiger,  
into its head and heart. It fell down and it remained motionless. Another shot, just to be sure,  
and Bellamy ran towards Clarke. Helped her jumping off the rock and hugged her tightly.

  
“What were you thinking”

  
He didn’t say it harsh, he put as much love into those 4 words as it was possible.  
They were the first words Bellamy said to her in almost 5 weeks. Clarke didn’t say anything she just hugged him and cried.  
He carried her away from the beast and leaned her against a tree at the river. Then sat next to her.

“You know what, Bellamy? I thought about jumping off the rock. Let the thing kill me.”  
“You WHAT? Clarke, no…”  
“Yes, what I did was horrible and I don’t think raven can forgive me… ever. I don’t think _I_ can forgive me”  
“Clarke it was the only way… You knew that… They would have killed him in the most terrible way.”  
She leaned her head against his shoulder staring at the river.  
“Thank you”

  
And with that words she fell asleep.  
Bellamy didn’t move until Clarke woke up. It was in the middle of the night, but that didn’t matter.  
The forest was enlightened from shining flowers and Butterflies. It was one of the prettiest views you could get.  
But he didn’t have eyes for that, his thoughts were only about Clarke.  
She opened her eyes.

  
“Bellamy? You stayed?”

  
She smiled and he smiled right back.

  
“You wanna go home?” Bellamy asked  
“Not yet”

  
So they stayed there for a few more hours, not talking, just sitting, until sunrise.

  
“You know what, Bellamy? I think I loved Finn”

  
Bellamy felt his heart starting to race, why did it felt like someone stabbed him?

  
“But did you notice how much he changed when I was gone. He was obsessed with me  
and I don’t know if I wanted a man who would forget everything around him just for one girl.  
I mean… Octavia told me about the girl he wanted to let die. Just like that...  
I don’t think I could really and deeply love someone like this”

  
“Clarke I… I don’t know what to say. Nobody can control who we fall in love with. Sometimes it just happens”

  
he choked.


	2. Chapter 2

-2-

Some days passed and Bellamy and Clarke didn’t talk much. Nobody talked much.

  
“Hey Bell, can I talk to you for a second?”  
“Sure Octavia, what’s wrong?”  
“No… not here. Can we go in your tent?”

  
Octavia closed the door and talked very quiet, but he knew what it was about.

  
“Octavia, I don’t want to talk about Clarke. I’m serious.”  
“But you can’t just pretend like it doesn’t affect you at all! Everyone sees how you look at her!”  
“Oh really, O? HOW exactly do I look at her?”  
“Bellamy, don’t be a coward. You know exactly what I mean!”

  
Yes, he knew it, but he didn’t want to admit it. Because he knew what it meant. Showing weakness.

  
“Okay, Bellamy, you don’t want to talk about it. I’m fine with that, but it can’t go on like this.”

  
Octavia walked away.  
Bellamy sighed and sat down on his bed. The first time in weeks he was alone. Not having any responsibilities.  
He looked at his hands. He wasn’t in charge at this Camp. Abby, Kane and Jaha were.   
They ruled the camp well and he was lucky to be accepted as a normal citizen and not a criminal.  
But that wasn’t what made him sigh. His thoughts are about Clarke again. She said she loved Finn.   
Usually Octavia was the only one he felt protective over. But when he met Clarke everything changed.   
He wanted to protect her from every pain. Maybe he could have saved Finn in any way,   
not because he liked Finn that much, but because of Clarke. She meant so much to him   
and all he wants was her to be happy. And she wasn’t happy at all. Bellamy sighed again   
and punched against his bed.   
He leaned against the wall and covered his head with his hands. He felt someone sitting next to him.

  
“Octavia go away I told you I don’t wanna talk about it!”  
“Talk about what?”

  
A familiar voice answered, but it wasn’t Octavia. It was Clarke.   
“Nothing important”  
“Bellamy you look awful. Don’t tell me everything is alright”  
“You wanna tell me that everything is alright with you?”

  
Clarke looked away. He was right. She couldn’t expect from him to talk to her about his problems.   
“Bellamy…”  
“Clarke what? What do you want from me? I wasn’t there for you when you needed me now you don’t have to be here. Go away.”  
“But…”  
“I’m serious!”  
“Bellamy. I know you’re hurt.”  
“Hurt because of what? I just don’t think that I deserve to live as a normal citizen in this camp after what I’ve done to Jaha, that’s it.”  
“I’m sorry”  
“No! I should be sorry! I should have protected you! I don’t want this for you! The grief!"

  
Bellamy shook his head. As if that changed anything.  
“Bellamy it’s not your fault. I did what I had to do. Yes I loved Finn…”

  
There it was again, the ache in his heart, when he heard those words.   
“…but I also said I couldn’t love someone who was as obsessed with me as he was.”

  
Bellamy raised his head looking at Clarke. She can’t be sure about this.  
“Clarke. I don’t…”  
“Bellamy Blake do you really think I could love someone who would  
let everyone on this planet die because of me? Just so I can live?”

  
Bellamy just looked at Clarke, confused. What was she saying?  
“Listen, I didn’t talk to anyone in the past weeks not only because I had to mourn Finn.  
Yes, that was the main reason, but that wasn’t the only thing I thought about. I appreciated it that you left me alone  
and I know now that I loved Finn, but I saw how much Raven loved him and I’m sure that I could have never loved him the way she did.   
He was her family. I talked to her and that was the reason I went into the forest the day before. But taking the guilt on me   
and dying because of that isn’t going to solve the problem…”  
“Clarke, I don’t know what you want me to do…”

  
Bellamy was confused. But he was also happy to have a real conversation with Clarke again.  
“I’m here for you, you know that, do you?” Bellamy said.  
“No, that isn’t what I wanted to say, but I’m also always there for you! I’m happy to have a friend like you”

  
_Friend._

  
“Thank you. It means a lot.”   
The word echoes in his head.

_Friend._

  
To vent his anger he went out into the forest and wanted to shoot some animals.  
Murphy went with him.   
They got along quite good in the last weeks and Bellamy didn’t have the energy to argue with anyone at that point.

  
“Bell, what’s wrong?”  
“Nothing”  
“Come on I’m not dumb. I can tell from your look. You shot that deer way too many times to be okay”  
Murphy laughed. And he infected Bellamy and they both laughed for a few minutes.  
“Thanks mate. I really need some distraction”  
“Sure thing! That’s what I’m here for”  


After they came back to the Camp, they didn’t bring any food with them, but that didn’t matter to Bellamy.   
For a few hours he had something else on his mind than Clarke.


	3. Chapter 3

-3-

For the next days living next to Clarke made it hard for Bellamy to think straight and concentrate on his tasks.  
The truce between the Grounders and the people from the ark made it even harder because literally nothing happened.   
Abby and Kane sent various parties to Mount Weather to safe the 47, but they didn’t have success yet.  
Clarke was often with them, but everytime they came back without success she got sadder.   
  
One day Clarke came to the Camp at the same time as Bellamy and Murphy.  
Bellamy saw Clarke was having the most pissed look he could imagine on her face.   
Right after Murphy and Bellamy brought the two deers and the savage they shot into the food cabin he marched straight to Clarke who sorted berries very aggressively.

  
“Clarke what’s wrong?  
“I can’t believe we still don’t know how to save the 47! We were out for 3 days and searched every possible entrance to Mount Weather!  
EVERY. SINGLE. ONE.   
But they all just decided to go home and make up another plan! As if we don’t have enough plans! We need to act!”

  
She threw the rest of the berries into the bowl and stepped away. Bellamy ran after her. Out of the camp through the forest into a clearing.

  
“Hey, Clarke… I know you’re upset. But if you really found a way to save the 47, they will make up the best plan possible and save them!”  
“You think? I’m afraid that we don’t do enough! That they’re dead by now..”  
“No, I don’t think they are. Jasper and Monty are clever, they wouldn’t do something stupid”

  
Clarke’s eyes teared up and she turned away. She didn’t want Bellamy to see her that weak.  
She felt his arms around her back and didn’t do anything against it. It made her happy how he cared about her.  
Clarke always thought that she and Bellamy are the leaders and they’re not allowed to show feelings,  
but the past weeks proved her wrong. She leaned against him and grabbed his hand.

  
“Thank you Bellamy”

  
They just stood there. They didn’t know how much time went by, but it was dark by the time they went back.   
Bellamy brought Clarke into her tent and gave her one last hug before he wanted to go.  
Then he felt it. Everything he tried to ignore for so long.   
He felt more for Clarke than just friendship and he couldn’t deny it anymore  
. He couldn’t lie to himself anymore. He pressed his head against her head and the sweet smell of her hair made him want to stay,   
but he slowly let go and wanted to turn away.

  
“Bellamy? I… Do you want to stay a little bit longer?”  
Her words were almost a whisper, but they were serious.

  
“Of course” he replied without hesitation.  
“I’ve had a terrible time during the last weeks Bellamy.”  
“I know, but it’s gonna be okay”

  
She sat down on her bed, shook her head and said  
“I know Bell. I know it for a few weeks now. It’s gonna be okay because you’re still here.   
You make everything less bad. Because of you I survived the last weeks”  
“But I didn’t do anything…”

  
Clarke took Bellamy’s hand and pulled him onto her bed so he sat next to her,  
then she turned her head so she could look into his eyes.

  
“You did. You may not have noticed it. But you were there. All the time.  
I knew everything was going to be okay because you were there. “

And the things she said, they were true. He felt the same way. She was still there.   
Clarke was there, looking at him with her beautiful eyes.

  
“You’re so strong, Clarke. You do know this, do you?”  
“So are you.”

  
She smiled. The most beautiful smile in the world.

  
“I just want our friends to be here with us again”  
“I know”  
“Could you maybe stay tonight? I… don’t want to be alone”

  
Clarke lay down and Bellamy right next to her.   
That was the first time for months he slept in one bed with a girl. He just wanted to feel Clarke near him.   
Clarke fell asleep within seconds, but Bellamy couldn’t find rest for hours.   
He just lay there staring at the roof and listening to the sound of Clarkes breath.  
They didn’t touch each other when they fell asleep,   
but at sunrise when Bellamy opened his eyes he felt his arm around Clarke’s body. And he didn’t want to move until she woke up, too.  
So he lay there for another hour just enjoying the moment.

  
“Thank you for staying”  
“You don’t have to say thank you all the time, I won’t let you alone.”  


 

Bellamy’s mood was on a high level for the whole day.   
He was out with Murphy again searching the forest and Clarke was out with Kane  
and their party to check the entrance to mount weather they found the other day.

  
“Oh my god, did you hear that?”

  
Murphy rushed into a bush and took Bellamy with him. Just in the right time because a giant Tiger raced past them.

  
“Wow, have you seen something like that before? I thought the two-headed deer was terrifying,   
but THIS is out of every league. We better go home”  
“Yeah I’ve seen that before, only once though. We better not take that too easily.   
Maybe we should tell the others that those beasts are out here”

  
They weren’t too far away from the camp, what made the beast even more dangerous.

  
“Murphy I don’t have a good feeling about this. Look at the ground. There’s blood, lots of blood.”  
“Should we go after it and kill it?”  
“Are you crazy? I only have 2 shots left and I think you don’t have any left, do you?”

Bellamy and Murphy sneaked back to the Camp. There was a lot of tumult going on.  
  
“Hey, what’s wrong?”  
  
Kane tried to calm everyone down but it was almost impossible.  
  
“Kane, why are you already back? Did you find something?”  
“No, Bellamy. We were attacked by something and we don’t know what. I’ll freak out if the Grounders broke the truce,  
we didn’t do anything wrong! In fact we didn’t do ANYTHING the past weeks!”  
“I think that weren’t the Grounders. I saw some really big creatures in the last weeks and they’re extremely aggressive…  
but wait, they attacked you? Is anyone hurt?"  
“Yes, to be honest, 3 people got hit. Bellamy… Clarke is one of them”

  
Bellamy didn’t even let him finish his sentence when he dashes into the hospital part of the ark.

  
“ABBY! ABBY!”  
“Oh my god, Bellamy you shouldn’t be here!”  


There she was, lying on the surgery table. Clarke had two huge wounds over her face and one over her upper body.   
There was blood everywhere and three people standing around her trying to stop the bleeding.

Bellamy felt his stomach turning around.


	4. Chapter 4

-4-

Clarke was unconscious for more than 4 days. Abby thought that this was a good thing so Clarke wouldn’t feel the pain.  
Octavia and Bellamy were by her side, but Bellamy even refused to go eat. So all the time Octavia showed up she brought food for her big brother.

  
“I’m worried, Bell. About you _and_ her.”  
“Don’t worry about me, O. I’m fine.”  
“I’m not so sure about that, but you won’t listen to me anyways. I brought you dinner. Eat.”  
“Thanks”  
Bellamy’s voice was only a mumble and Octavia disappeared.  
  
  
“Clarke, please wake up… I can’t do this without you… please”  
he whispered in her ear. He stroke over her hair and lay his head on her chest.  
“Clarke, you’re more than just a friend to me. You’re important. Don’t leave me alone, please…”

  
Bellamy didn’t see it when Clarke opened her eyes because his head was on her chest but when he suddenly felt her hand moving he raised his head.

  
“Clarke..!”  
“Did you mean it?”  
“What?”  
“What you said. I heard it… did you mean it?”  
“Clarke, you really are important to me. But you should know that…”  
“I know” she smiled “But I like to hear it”

 

After a few days Clarke got better and was allowed to leave the Hospital section.  
Her wounds healed very well and thanks to her mother’s medicine they didn’t infect.  
One day after dinner Bellamy took Clarke’s arm and pulled her aside.  
  
“Look, we’re not allowed to go outside without weapons or a guard, which I think, is absolutely nonsense, but your mother is worried about you. _  
But_ there’s one spot you probably know, but just come with me, okay?”

  
Clarke laughed, she liked it when Bellamy was that insecure around her. He was all bossy when he was with anyone else.  
But she just felt special when she was with him.  
They walked around the ark to a spot where Clarke was often just to think after Finn’s death.  
It had an amazing view over the landscape. And the sunset was beautiful, too.

  
“I’m glad you’re better. I just wanted to tell you something and I wanted it to be me who told you this.  
I talked to Kane and Abby before so..”  
“Bellamy just say it” Clarke smiled.  
“Okay, what If we have the most amazing plan ever to finally save the 47?”  
“You can’t be serious…”  
Clarke was thrilled but also stunned at the same time  
“I am! While you were absolutely useless lying in the hospital beds and I was sure you were awake and safe we made up the perfect plan.  
I won’t tell you just yet, but…”

  
He couldn’t even finish because Clarke hugged him too tight and just wouldn’t let go

  
“Bellamy you’re awesome! I don’t even know what to say.”

  
She cried, but they were tears of joy. She loosened from Bellamy and looked him in the eyes.  
Her eyes were full of tears, but she smiled the most beautiful smile in the world. And he felt it again.  
The feeling she gave him. He was absolutely in love with her. He loved everything about Clarke, he loved her smile, her laugh and he even loved it when she was mad at him or when they didn’t have the same opinion.  
Bellamy Blake was in love with Clarke and he couldn’t do a thing about it.  
Her laugh was absolutely stunning and all he could do was just laugh with her.

  
“Bellamy it really IS going to be okay. It really is!”

  
She hugged him again and leaned her head against his chest.

  
“I know, Princess. I know…”

  
Clarke hesitated for a second, nobody has called  
her princess since Finn’s death, but it was alright. It felt right.  
She looked at Bellamy and just couldn’t stop smiling. And then Bellamy kissed her.  
He felt his heart racing and pounding in his chest and he thought she must definitely felt his heart because it almost shook his whole body.  
Clarke put her hands against his chest and he felt sparks everywhere she touched him.  
His hands grabbed her head and pulled her closer to him. He didn’t want to let her go. Ever.  
He was finally sure about his feelings, he didn’t have to hide them anymore.  
And what makes him even happier, she returned the kiss. Clarke put her arms around his neck and Bellamy lifted her up, pressing her against the wall of the ark.  
The kiss remained forever.

  
“Wow”  
“Clarke, I… I know you said you loved Finn, but…”  
“Don’t you listen, I said LOVED. That’s past tense. I wasn’t sure about my feelings for a long time. And you were there for me, more than anyone else. Or maybe that’s just my point of view, but I care about you, a lot.”  
  
                                                                             _\- to be continued-_


End file.
